A Diabetic Sailor's Logbook

A Day in the Life of a Diabetic

2012-02-07T10:38:00.001-08:00

I've decided to start something new. It's a story about a typical diabetic girl. But it's not just me writing it. It's a chain story. So I've written the first chapter and handed it off. It's the story of one night (maybe more?) of Sam who walks into a bar. That's about as much direction as I have given it. Let me know if you want to take a stab at one of the chapters (really just a couple of

Finally a Useful Upgrade

2012-01-18T21:00:00.000-08:00

I just received the new Minimed pump. It now asks stupid questions to remind me to do things I instinctually do because I have been pumping so long. After I prime the tubing, it asks me, "Do you see drops at the end of the tubing?" I usually yell at it, "You think I would have stopped priming if I didn't?" I wish I knew how to hack into its software and program it to ask more

My New Super Power

2012-01-17T12:36:00.000-08:00

Since I've had this radiation treatment, I've been asked several times if I am going to have super powers. I laughed it off, humoring them for their silly questions. But now that I have been radioactive, being out among people today, I realize I do have a super power no one can see. An evil power, but a power none the less. I can sit down right next to a person in a restaurant and literally

SOLITARY CONFINEMENT- DAY 4

2012-01-13T17:20:00.001-08:00

Today I hit a wall. A writing wall. It was probably because I spent the last seventy-two hours in front of a computer. I thought with all this time off I could accomplish great feats of writing, maybe even finish a book. But instead I have accomplished very little on the book front. I have left far too many status updates on Facebook and read far too many articles and books and blogs and theology

SOLITARY CONFINEMENT-DAY 2

2012-01-12T09:15:00.000-08:00

What a completely different experience than yesterday. I woke up feeling hungover. I don't think my body handled the twelve hours of hyper that was my day yesterday. I was dragging all morning until I passed out for two hours. After that I felt a little more human. But the solitary confinement is starting to wear on me. I realized today the reason I love to have eight hours a day to write

SOLITARY CONFINEMENT- DAY 1

2012-01-11T09:15:00.000-08:00

My day started at five am so that I could get one last meal in before six hours of fasting in preparation for my thyroid ablation today. I was back in bed by five fifteen after yet another bowl of oatmeal and plate of egg whites- some of the only foods I could find that are easy to prepare, somewhat appetizing, and on the low-iodine diet I've had to be on since the first of the year- but

The New Year's Bet

2012-01-07T09:13:00.000-08:00

I made a New Year's bet that I am now regretting. I had some other New Year's goals-to finally finish the book and get it published and to rebrush my teeth after the 2 a.m. sugar fest to fix the low blood sugar. But this one was much more difficult. I was to give up Diet Doctor Pepper. Really, I had to give up all soda. I know of the perils of soda, how the carbonation can rob your bones

Sunbathing on the First

2012-01-03T07:45:00.001-08:00

Laying out in the sun in eighty degree weather on the first day of the year sure makes me grateful to live in Southern California where I can train outdoors year-round with no problems whatsoever. I don’t even own running pants. Most days I can barely stand to run in more than shorts and a running bra. But it also means I never really have a good excuse to wimp out of a run or bike. It's this

I Just Can't Kick You

2011-10-24T19:33:00.000-07:00

The disease I thought I could kick is now back with a vengeance. I had hoped it was a transient pain in the ass, but, alas, I am not that lucky. I now have another life-long, chronic, just-another-thing-to-add-to-my-resume disease. I tried eighteen months of drugs that I knew only gave me a thirty-seventy shot at a permanent fix. Looks like I got the thirty side. So I am headed back into

Tip of the Day

2011-10-01T14:17:00.000-07:00

So here's the diabetes tip of the day. Make a basal check a standard procedure every two to three months. Like I've said before, I've been struggling with blood sugars all over the place but mostly up. My first thought is always to my site failing or my pump not working properly. But rarely do I figure that maybe its my basal rates that have overstayed their welcome. The last time I checked or

Fine Tuning

2011-09-30T12:40:00.000-07:00

I have recently moved my infusion sight down to my outer thigh and have been having huge problems with it. I usually rotate the site locations depending on the season. Spring and summer, when I am in a bathing suit more than not, require that I hide the site under a bikini so it goes into my upper butt between where the pocket of my jeans is and the waistband. Fall and winter make it easier to

More Days LIke This

2011-09-29T12:36:00.000-07:00

I think paid sick days from work should be handed out on a sliding scale. Most jobs will come up with some arbitrary number of days that you can miss a year and still get paid. Maybe they should work on tightening up that formula. The standard person gets ten. Oh You're a diabetic, that's four extra days a year. So you have hyperthyroidism, that's worth three extra. You haven't seen a doctor in

The Lazy Man's Solution

2011-09-18T14:59:00.000-07:00

I've been looking for creative ways to write more for this blog and I hear the lazy man will go to a meme when he is out of ideas. I have come up with some creative ways to inspire me, but as I am fighting off a headache and nausea from working in the fumes in my newly painted office, I thought a lazy way was warranted today. So here is the first meme I found (what's the point of being lazy, if

Has It Really Been Six Months?

2011-09-12T19:55:00.000-07:00

My husband, Tony, has been doing triathlons for three years now. He has come from a couch potato to placing very high in his age group. Yesterday he went to pick up his race packet for yet another race, his fifth this year. As he reached the front of the line he gave the lady behind the counter his name and the greatest thing happened. "Spineto? Is your wife that diabetic sailor girl?" she

Just One of Those Days

2011-03-22T19:16:00.000-07:00

I thought I would come back from a trip like this one with so much to say. Some new revelation about living with diabetes, maybe come back having conquered the disease. But really, I came back to the same old shit I always deal with. There is no conquering this disease. There is no point where you have become good enough at taking care of yourself that it just goes away. There is no

Best Morning Yet

2011-02-25T04:48:00.000-08:00

I think by far this has been the best morning yet. With a small craft advisory on for today, it has made the decision to end my trip a little early a no brainer. There is no way I'm going against NOAA. And technically I made it to Key West, its just the east end instead of the west end, but it's Key West all the same. I got to sleep in until 7 and am having a nice breakfast outside the deck of a

2011-02-21T18:27:00.000-08:00

After a long day of travel by plane, train, and automobile, - have finally settled in to my home for the next few days. Paul and the guys at Key Lime Sailing Club have been working all afternoon to get the boat ready and it is more than - imagined. She looks great and is ready to sail first thing in the morning. I have 26 nautical miles to cover tomorrow so it should be a long day. And God

TWITTER FEED

2011-02-09T19:39:00.000-08:00

The journey starts in just 10 days. On February 21, I will fly to Miami to get set up for the four-day solo sail to raise money for insulindependence.org. Subscribe to my twitter feed so you can follow my adventure in real-time. To get text message updates of my progress, go to www.twitter.com/erinspineto and click on the icon of the cell phone next to the big follow button (you will need to set

The Official Rules

2011-02-02T19:47:00.000-08:00

Someone else has developed most athletic endeavors you sign up for. You choose a marathon or a triathlon or, if you are really up for an extremely daring undertaking, you sign up for the Florida Challenge, a 1200-mile paddle around the whole state of Florida. The rules are set, the course is chosen, and all you have to do is show up. You are given a copy of the rules so you know the criteria

Managing Diabetes On Board

2011-01-11T19:43:00.000-08:00

As I get closer to launch day for my sailing trip, I have been focusing more on my diabetes management plan. One of the things that I have been concentrating on is my breakfast. It has always been one of the harder meals to get right because of the different hormones that circulate in the body and bring you from a sleeping state to a fully alert state. Most of these hormones make the body

The Growing To Do LIst

2011-01-06T19:40:00.000-08:00

One of the hardest things about planning my four-day, single-handed sail through the Florida Keys this February is juggling of all the side projects associated with the trip. Not only do I have to plan normal travel arrangements like airplane tickets, reservations, and meals, but I have to plan for the aspects of the trip that make it more of an event. There are blogs to write and websites

PLan B Book

2010-12-28T19:39:00.000-08:00

I have two sides to my personality, one that likes to fly free, moving on every whim of desire and taking every opportunity as soon as it presents itself, and the other, which is my practical side. It’s my practical side that likes to prepare and research and plan for every possible obstacle. Single-handed sailing through the Florida Keys this February will provide a place for both sides

Old Reliables

2010-12-25T19:49:00.000-08:00

After spending the last 14 years as a runner, I have easily run over 2000 times. I have run different routes, in different cities, in different weather and in different clothes, but there are those runs that I will run over and over again. Routes that have cemented themselves in my mind, ones that I look forward to running every time. There is the 2.75 mile route from my

Out the Window: Preparing to Sail Solo

2010-12-22T19:33:00.000-08:00

I have thirty-four red marks on my outer thighs from the insulin infusion sets and continuous glucose monitor sensors that make their home beneath my epidermis for up to a week at a time. The tissue in my upper buttocks is currently too scarred up to even use to inject insulin. I have a nice long scar at the base of my abdomen from having two c-sections to free children who grew very fat

The Two-Story Diabetic

2010-12-14T19:42:00.000-08:00

When we chose our house I was thrilled to get one on a cul-de-sac so the kids could run around without having to call off their game of football with a resounding, "CAR!!". The panoramic ocean view from both kids' rooms was a great selling point as was the community pool and jacuzzi to finally teach the kids to swim. The one thing I overlooked was the fact that a diabetic should never live in a

Multivariable Equations

2010-12-06T19:52:00.000-08:00

As any good scientist knows, if you want to find out what effect any one part of your experiment has on the outcome, you change only one thing at a time. Diabetes is much like an ongoing experiment that I conduct on an on-going basis. Recently it has all gone haywire and after months of not being able to catch up with it, I went a little ape-shit. I decided to change nearly all of it and

2010-11-08T19:38:00.000-08:00

Today I crossed a treshhold. The one point in my mind of no return. Today I purchased my airline ticket to Miami. My non-refundable, I'm out a pocket full of cash if I don't follow through with this trip ticket. So I guess I'm all in at this point. The funny thing is I decided on which ticket to buy over a week ago. I looked at the website about eight times just staring at the itinerary and

Diabetes by the Numbers

2010-11-01T20:04:00.000-07:00

252 - Last blood sugar reading 684 - Highest blood sugar on record- although it may be a bit inaccurate since the new meters don't go higher than 599 28 - Lowest blood sugar on record- They say you're supposed to pass out at 30 102 - Favorite blood sugar- high enough not to worry about lows and not the "perfect 100" that everyone else strives for- 15 - Pounds dropped at diagnosis 19 - pounds

A New Kind of Training

2010-10-19T19:45:00.000-07:00

For the first time in over 2 years, I am finally seeing the payoff from my workouts. I am getting stronger and faster and I can go longer. I have tripled my long swim in only 4 weeks. After spending two years, working out whenever I wasn't totally fatigued and still seeing rising times and declining mileage, I am more than happy to see that trend reversing. I am 4 weeks in to a 20 week

Future Plans

2010-10-11T19:39:00.000-07:00

After hyping up the Velux 5 Ocean race to my class (I tie the solo, round-the-world sailing race into Earth Science somehow) and showing the documentary Deep Water about the first solo, round-the-world sailing race, my students asked me if I was ever going to do the race. Although I won't rule it out, I don't think I could be away from my family for that long, well, maybe if I'm 90 and I outlive

A New Mode

2010-09-27T19:47:00.000-07:00

Now that I am back at work, and, really, back among the living I get asked a lot how I am doing. I think i fielded that question at least 20 times in the last few weeks since school started. I usually answer that I am feeling ok. Not really normal, but, maybe, a new normal? That's the thing I am most recently learning;. I thought this new disease was an easy fix, just take some meds and I am

The Best Laid Plans of Mice and Men

2010-09-20T19:22:00.000-07:00

I had set out to write tonight, got dressed, got my butt into my writing studio. I realized how often b.s. stands in the way. Right at 7 when I sit to write, my blood sugar dips to 62 and takes with it any capacity to think clearly. so, I sit here, pecking away at the keys with one hand, the other holding up my sagging head, fully aware of the dullness sand myriad (yeah, I know it's overused) of

An Aptitude for Solitude

2010-09-13T19:42:00.000-07:00

I snuck out for a few moments on my way to Back to School Night Tuesday and saw the horizon out of my open car window. I smelled the ocean and pictured myself for a moment out on that ocean with nothing surrounding me but the sea, watching the sun rise and the sun set for four days in a row. I realized how much my soul needs some version of extended solitude. Some people are made for

Impromptus at Leisure

2010-08-30T19:45:00.000-07:00

Consistency has always been one of my shortcomings. I can start any new program or goal with gusto, only to be quickly stifled by my waning interest and quickly my real-life responsibilities take over. It is the reason I am always on the lookout for new diabetic technology. If I can have some new gizmo or gadget I will get interested in taking care of myself. For a while. And

Practical Dreams

2010-08-07T10:23:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I dream big, owning my own private island with a dock out front and at least four boats tied up to it right next to a perfect right point break and a private tutor to come school the kids for six hours a day while I write and sail and surf everyday. Sometimes I dream a little more practically. Owning a MacGregor 26 is more of this kind of a dream. It's got an affordable sticker

Pancakes and Christine Colby

2010-08-05T20:38:00.000-07:00

Today I made pancakes. Lots of small, dollar-sized pancakes. And today I served them to my seven-year-old daughter and her friend who slept over last night. Shea and Julia, today, are the same age I was when I would wake to a hundred tiny, dollar-sized pancakes and bacon, and being the same age, we ate them all. Today, I served up those same pancakes without the bacon (Shea has been a

Sensor Dating

2010-08-05T19:39:00.000-07:00

I have had the great fortune of trying out a new continuous glucose monitor recently. I currently am using the one my insurance says they prefer, but, a friend of mine happens to work for another company out there producing the CGMS’s. So, I thought I would give it a try. Being a scientist by training, I decided to run both sensors at the same time to see first hand which is more

Why "Captain Blackbeard Did What?"

2010-07-09T19:50:00.000-07:00

I know it’s a rather odd title, so here is my explanation, as best I can put it… There’s a chickenish stubble, and fish belly skin On that face, once so blazin’ and brave. Now no one is fearing his look or his lash Or his threats of a watery grave. Since ol’ Captain Blackbeard shaved. I was raised in bookstores. Not the loud, corporate, superstores of today, but the small, local, muted

There's Always a Way

2010-05-11T11:00:00.000-07:00

With so many limitations placed on diabetics by doctors ("You'll never drive a big-rig for a living"), the media (in that news-casterly fake empathy, "Diabetics must watch and measure every thing that goes in their mouth"), and the general public ("Should you really be eating that cookie with your sugar disease and all?"), I sometimes surprise myself but setting up my own barriers. A few weeks

Three at a Time

2010-04-29T08:59:00.000-07:00

Three? Three at a time? Really? Three? Didn’t they learned in Kindergarten like the rest of us that’s it is the polite thing to take turns. I could even have handle two of them at a time, but three? Why couldn’t it be that when the bronchitis wants a turn the diabetes politely says, “Oh, Bronny, you haven’t had a turn in a while, and I’m getting sick of this rain. Why don’t

The Thyroid Train

2010-04-22T09:43:00.000-07:00

The details of this illness and how it has been shaping my life for the last two years are long and dull, so I won't bother with a list of all the ways it sucks to be me right now, except to mention that it is a very weird place to be when none of your emotions are actually tied into reality. My thyroid's got my limbic system all screwed up so that feelings come drifting through me with no

An Unusual Precaution

2010-04-06T09:09:00.000-07:00

When you fist get diagnosed with Diabetes the doctors give you a brief education on the disease. I had mine while wasting time locked in a hospital for the weekend. The nurse would wheel in a TV with a VCR hooked up to it (this was in 1996) and play some outdated video very similar to the types you would see in drivers ed in high school. They would show you the basics and try to scare the crap

It Was Inevitable

2010-03-30T21:10:00.000-07:00

I snatched it from my mailbox on the way out the door. I couldn't wait to get started as it stared at me from the van's center console. At the first stoplight, I flipped to the right page. I had only a moment to read the first line. IT WAS INEVITABLE. I had read a passage from the book a while ago and was instantly enthralled. I must have this story. That one passage created a world for me,

A New Chronic

2010-02-17T19:42:00.000-08:00

Just to make this trip a little more challenging, as if I thought it was a bit too easy to simply manage the twenty-seven foot sailboat, Pagan Charm, and the chronic and often deadly diabetes while all alone on the ocean, I thought I would pick up another chronic disease. I shopped around and thought it might add a little challenge to have my immune system off

A View of Catalina Through the Lens

2009-12-20T16:51:00.000-08:00

Some pictures from my last Catalina trip, a three-day jaunt to brush up on my navigation skills and get some time on the water. Sunrise over the water our last day out. Something I have wanted to see for a long time. The first day out, after anchoring in Two Harbors, we hiked to the other side of the island to watch the sunset. This is the view looking back at Cat Harbor from

Inside the Mind of a Diabetic

2009-11-24T19:09:00.000-08:00

If you have ever had the unusual pleasure of having a meal with a diabetic you might have noticed that moment when they look off to the left, appearing deep in thoughts somehow not entirely related to the current conversation. If you have ever wondered what it was running around in their head, here is a small glimpse into the things they have to think about on an almost constant basis. A little

Putting Flesh on the Bones of My Dreams

2009-11-10T18:57:00.000-08:00

My life seems to be cluttered with half finished projects. A poster size map of the Inter Coastal Waterway, a book of architectural designs and master plan of a New Urbanism community, the twelve-string guitar I once knew how to play. They were all so easy to drop, too. As soon as I have that picture in my mind of what it will look like when it was finished, I no longer felt the need to

Rebellion at Club Med

2009-09-15T20:07:00.001-07:00

The last time I can remember packing them was early one Thursday morning last spring, before anyone in the house was up. My insulin pump had kinked up and failed to give me any insulin during the night and a night without insulin makes for one hell of a morning. My blood sugars had steadily crept up during the night, I was flying high around 500 when I struggled to pull myself from bed. It

Signs You're a Triahtlete

2009-09-03T19:17:00.000-07:00

1. The water bottles in your house out number the cups. 2. Your concept of a date night with your husband is to get a babysitter, go on a 25 mile bike ride, and then stop in for some recovery nutrition. 3. To get ready for a night out, you don’t spend 2 hours getting showered and dressed, you spend 2 hours on a run to burn off the calories you plan to consume at dinner later that night. 4. You

My Greatest Diabetic Tool

2009-08-13T19:33:00.000-07:00

One of the greatest finds in my diabetic life was really not a diabetic product at all. One of the main problems with having diabetes is needing to keep the amount of sugar in your blood within a very narrow window. There are a hundred factors you have to balance and calculate. And most of the time, you’re really just estimating. There is no number for how hard you pushed on your last swim or

Brown is Much Easier Than White

2009-06-23T19:29:00.000-07:00

Last night I found myself in an unfamiliar kitchen shoveling down brown sugar in front of a somewhat concerned and scared lady. It was the first night of a Bible study a friend invited me to where I knew nobody. Johnny, my CGM, alerts me that I'm low, so I go to my truck parked outside to find I have once again forgotten to replace my emergency stash of sugars. I had to ask the

Never Never Land

2009-05-11T19:29:00.000-07:00

I think I have done such a good job of convincing myself that I can do anything with diabetes and that it will never stop me-- I surround myself with Diabetics who are conquering the world, I read the thoughts of those who are pushing the limits of what is possible, I talk with the experts who are pushing for us to go harder--- so much so that I forget entirely that I am sick. And I am sick.

He's In

2009-05-10T08:02:00.000-07:00

Finally, after years of listening to the complaining, he's in. He's one of them. Every Saturday and Sunday in Encinitas (home of the tri) there are more bikers than cars. And, accordingly, they do take up a lot of the road. Each morning I would sit next to Tony in our car listening to him complain about having to share the road with the clippity-cloppers. (derived from the

Wildflower Warning

2009-04-27T18:54:00.000-07:00

So, I'm winding down in my preparation for my race this weekend. Starting to do a little more packing and planning and a little less training, not that I did all that much training for this one. I set aside 12 weeks to go hard to prepare for this race. I had kept pretty strong in the off season and my training was starting to really take off. I was getting faster than I ever had and

July 2010- The Plan

2009-04-08T08:42:00.001-07:00

So here's the plan... July 2010. Fly into Miami, grab a car and drive to Marathon, about halfway down the keys. Check Continuous Glucose Monitor to see how sitting still for 6 hours has affected my blood sugars. Adjust accordingly. Find a place to stay and get some grub at a nearby eatery. Bolus. Try to find an internet hookup to update blog, revel in the fact that most people down here are

A Good Silverstein

2009-04-06T19:47:00.000-07:00

The sea is a-roarin’, the sea gulls they screech, The bosun he rants and raves. And the whole scurvy crew Says, it’s true, yes it’s true, Ol’ Captain Blackbeard’s shaved.” We had buried some treasure (and bodies as well) And was just sailin’ back from the cave, When he calls fer boiled water And stomps down below An’ gor’ but he comes up shaved. There’s a chickenish stubble, and fishbelly skin

Where Did All the Fun Go?

2009-04-06T09:01:00.000-07:00

Do you remember the time in your life when all your responsibilities for the day could be filled in about 20 minutes? Get up, make your bed, feed the dog and clean your room. The rest of the day was yours. And each day seemed to last forever. They stretched out for ever in front of you. LIke an eternal adventure you never knew in which direction it would blow. Stretch 3 months of those

FLORIDA KEYS 2010

2009-04-02T20:04:00.000-07:00

For 13 long years I have contended with Diabetes on my own. Of course I had family and friends to lend their support, a husband who was amazing at helping me deal with the emotional side of Diabetes, and good doctors to give me Diabetes Basic Training and to run their tests, but I never knew a single other person with Diabetes. You see, Diabetes is a tricky opponent. The goal is to keep the

How to Be Character #6

2009-02-18T20:09:00.000-08:00

How to be character number six in ten steps...1. Need to arrange your silverware at a restaurant neatly at the edge of your napkin.2. Be man enough to let me beat you at basketball (not that you could have stopped me :) )3. Watch those stupid chick flicks with me without telling anyone I had succumbed to them. (oh crap, I think i just let that one out of the bag)4. Be able to walk down the pier

The Revolt of the Body - Part 4

2009-02-15T23:22:00.000-08:00

I can remember lying on the couch for hours, after everyone had retired for the night, arguing with myself about how wise it would be to wake him up and tell him where my heart was at, to tell him we could make a go of it, that I could deal with his past even if he couldn't, that I could even get past his grown out, mountain-man, sloppy hair. But, alas, as is true to my nature,

The Revolt of the Body- Part 3

2009-02-15T23:02:00.000-08:00

With us there had always been a lot left unsaid. I was a lot younger and far more new to the dating scene. I never wanted to look like a fool. So when he would try to talk to me about things, I would agree like I knew what he was talking about, always so afraid to ask, "what exactly does that mean?" When he ended things, he gave me some explanation that was so vague that I

The Revolt of the Body - Part 2

2009-02-15T22:52:00.000-08:00

And so the next morning, after the cold had added insult to injury by freezing my now mangled joint, I was left behind to wallow on what was one of the least crowded days of the year. While I should have been riding run after run of near empty hills, I was sitting, leg elevated and iced on a couch left over from the crazy decorating trends of the seventies, an itchy brown-orange tweed

The Revolt of the Body - Part 1

2009-02-15T22:42:00.000-08:00

So I thought I would try my hand at a narrative. It comes to you in four parts, in four days. Let me know what you think.... The snow outside had built up to a good twenty-four inches overnight. The whole reason for coming on this trip was shot. I would be left behind when all my friends would take off to hit the slopes. Left behind to watch one of the most quickly won Super Bowls

Another Shower Epiphany

2009-02-11T19:55:00.001-08:00

I was in my thinking spot, more commonly referred to as the shower, the only place I can get a period of time long enough to complete a thought in my head, reflecting on my last piece of writing and more over the tone of the last 4 months of my writing, when I realized that I had once again fallen into the depressing part of my emotional tide chart. Just like the tides come

25 Random Facts

2009-02-08T19:39:00.000-08:00

So I was asked to write 25 random things about myself. what follows is the answer... 1. i am a procrastinator. look how long it took me to do this. I am so behind on the trend. 2. i am a diabetic, type 1, who runs triathlons and sails to prove that i am in control, not my broken pancreas. 3. i am writing my memoirs on doing #2. 4. i hate capitalizing stuff when i type. 5. i want to sail single

Socially Retarded, Who Me?

2009-01-25T18:12:00.000-08:00

It has been so long since I have felt so socially retarded. For those of you who knew me in high school and college you know how socially inept I can be. Get me in small groups or in a card game or around any sport and I am on my game. But when that group grows to 15 or 20 or it becomes a party carried only by conversation and I freak out. I go someplace in my mind and can't seem to come

Why Sail?

2009-01-25T10:51:00.001-08:00

Type 1 Diabetes is a multi-talented killer. It kills quickly, it kills slowly and it can kill by stripping you of any desire to truly live. One slip up in your dosing math, one time you forget your safety sugars, one underestimation of how hard that workout really was and the amount of sugar in your blood plummets to the point where there is not enough to support your

Who are these people?

2009-01-23T10:38:00.000-08:00

So do you recognize any of these people yet? Give me your best guess. I'm sure a couple of you have recognized yourselves...

Numero Five

2009-01-21T19:47:00.001-08:00

You know the drill...1. Be able to eat mac-n-cheese with me every Sunday for weeks on end.2. Be one of the few people able to sit and do absolutely nothing and still make it interesting.3. Be so easy to drive crazy just by moving a few items in your room just an inch, and tilting paintings a few degrees off center.4. Be able to grow up and not loose any of the good parts of yourself5. Be

Character Four

2009-01-21T19:35:00.000-08:00

So here we go again. If you want to be Character Four, here's what to practice...1. Always be laughing.2. Keep a beta fish in a shot glass.3. Run 10 miles at a sub-6 pace and still be able to run your "recovery" runs with me slowly enough so I wouldn't feel too bad.4. Always ask "What did you read today?" so that I would have to read daily so as not to be caught without an answer to that one.5.

Swimming the Keys

2009-01-17T15:48:00.000-08:00

There are those runs every so often, when you feel like you can run forever without even a hint of fatigue. Where your mind drifts off into that happy place and your body just relaxes. I’ve gone to that place a few times while running but never when swimming. Its kind of hard to get into a groove when every 18 strokes a huge wall looms and forces you to break stride to

Bouncing along as Character Three

2009-01-04T19:09:00.000-08:00

Let's try to keep this one to a real 10 steps... Character Three1. Be willing to give, never asking for anything in return.2. Have an abundance of energy.3. Have your head bowed when a camera appears.4. Be able to share a 10'x10' apartment with 4 other guys and not loose your mind. (Or maybe you did at times.)5. Never stand for the cheesy Christianeeze constantly being thrown at you.6.

Character Two

2009-01-02T19:00:00.000-08:00

In 10 steps or less how to be Character Two1. Play House of Pain way too loud and way too often.2. Use coupons for everything.3. Write me letters in college just so I wouldn't have to find an empty mailbox once again.4. Always take a picture whenever we hung out before the days of the camera phone.5. Play baseball in a way that made me want to come out and watch.6. Take me out on a date without

Character One

2009-01-02T18:53:00.001-08:00

If you ever wanted to know how to play the part of one of the many people in my life.. Here's your 10 step programTo be Character One1. Teach me the finer points of snack shack hot dogs made at home and a Dr. Pepper eaten on the roof of your house on a beautiful summer day.2. Be moody.3. Be willing to drive up a mountain at 5 in the morning just to get a better view of the sunrise.4. Count the

31 days of character sketches

2009-01-02T18:48:00.000-08:00

Since it's the new year I thought I would try to become a little more disciplined. So I am going to put a little more effort into this writing thing that I have been doing. For 31 (ish) days I am going to work on some character sketches (it's one of my many weaknesses). One a day for every day in January. And being the slacker I am I have already missed a day, the first day. Oh well, you screw

MY OWN KIND OF DEATH SENTANCE

2008-10-27T15:10:00.000-07:00

My definition of a good day: Wake up, put on bathing suit, shorts. If you can make it through the day w/o having to put on shoes or a shirt, it has been a good day. So when I first saw my endo in his white orthopedic shoes I wondered how long it had been since he has had a good day. He talked w/ my mom and gave me the Intro to Diabetes lecture, had me practice on an orange

Fish Tacos

2008-10-27T14:01:00.000-07:00

So, as I sit to write over my fish taco lunch, I start to calculate. Just how many fish tacos have I had in the last 13 years? 5000 maybe? 10,000? I was introduced to this culinary masterpiece in February of my freshman year at UCSD. My friend Aaron was already hooked. I would tease him for eating this monstrosity, until the day he challenged me with the magic words that were, and still are

Low Again...

2008-10-27T13:56:00.000-07:00

Even as I sit to write, I am struck yet again with a low (just overzealous to correct a high, fueled by my general frustration with this whole diabetes thing) so my brain just cannot get into that writing place.

The Middle

2008-10-27T13:47:00.000-07:00

ENTER INSULIN PUMP: For the first time in over a year, I actually got hungry. And it was such a foreign feeling. How odd is that, that such a basic human feeling, one that a baby can feel immediately after birth, was so foreign to me. I actually would go without eating for a few hours just to feel it again. And I somehow felt a little more human, more while, more "fixed". Of

The Beginnings

2008-10-27T13:44:00.000-07:00

I remember a time before Diabetes when I ate because I was hungry and the only crashing I did was from playing too hard and having too much fun. I had 19 great years of ignorance of the complicated life and incredible intelligence of my hard-working pancreas. And then it was over... ENTER DIABETES: I now eat because "it is time." The insulin that I gave myself at 8a.m. has peaked and I

DISCLAIMER

2008-10-27T13:25:00.001-07:00

This is not an upbeat, encouraging page of how great I am managing my diabetes. I think I've gotten to the place in my life where I am either too tired, too lazy, or too cynical to put on the brave face, or the happy face, or the "what are you talking about, I have no problems?" face. I think so often we try so hard to be good that we forget to show other people our faults. We sit in a group

The Start

2008-10-23T16:21:00.000-07:00

I don't feign myself a writer. Although I suppose I might have turned out to be one, the daughter of an author and a Literature teacher. I suppose maybe science and math were my own little rebellion. But of late I have been inspired by an author and a couple of good songwriters, whose writings seem so simple and understated, that I was at once reminded of the pure joy of childhood and first